10 Tips Every Maid of Honor Should Know

A good maid of honor (MOH) needs to be one part strategist, one part go-getter, one part manager, and one part confidant. Being chosen as the MOH for your best friend’s wedding is a huge privilege, and an even huger responsibility. It takes a lot of planning, preparation, and, let’s face it, partying to bring off a successfully wedding, and you, as MOH will have a large part to play in its success. Let’s take a look at some of the things you should know as you step into your new role:

  1. It’s about the bride. Your most important duty as MOH will be providing emotional support for the bride. Just accept from the beginning that you are probably going to have about 500 conversations regarding flowers and wedding cakes, and during some of those conversations, the bride will be crying. Give her the reassurance and encouragement she needs to make it through an incredibly stressful process.

 

  1. Give an honest (but not too honest) opinion. As MOH, you might be asked to go wedding dress shopping or help the bride pick out a pattern for china. During these situations, it’s important to be honest but supportive. Try not to let your bride choose something truly awful, but always remember that it is her wedding and she has the final say. If she really has her heart set on something that you don’t agree with, respect her judgment and let it go.

 

  1. Help out where needed. As MOH your duties might sometimes resemble those of a worker bee. Help the bride and her family do some of the grunt work for the wedding: address a wedding invitation or two (or 200), make the seating arrangement, make a list of presents received at the shower, etc. Be proactive and ask what you can do to pitch in.

 

  1. All those bridesmaids? You’re in charge. As MOH, you’re the chairwoman of the bridesmaid committee. It’s up to you to try to communicate with everyone about wedding arrangements. Let everyone know the plans for dresses, fittings, parties, rehearsals, bouquets, shoes, and anything else the bride needs to communicate. You’ll also be in charge of making sure that the bridesmaids show up on time and that the drama is kept to a minimum.

 

  1. You pay for your dress. Unless you have an incredibly rich and generous best friend, you and the other bridesmaids pay for all your wedding attire, from the hair pieces to the shoes.

 

  1. Host a beautiful shower. And a killer bachelorette party. You’ll need to plan both of these pre-wedding events with the bride in mind. Have the bridesmaid committee help you select dates and venues.

 

  1. Make the bride look beautiful. On the big day, make sure that you show up to the wedding location early and help the bride with her dress (and help her get dressed if she asks). When she walks up the aisle and when she stands in the reception line, check to make sure her veil and train are perfect.

 

  1. The ring, the bouquet, and the license. Three of the biggest wedding day duties are keeping the groom’s ring safe, holding the bride’s bouquet while the vows are being exchanged, and signing the marriage license as a witness if asked. Make sure to practice these assignments—know beforehand where you’ll put the ring and just when to hand over the bouquet for the couple’s walk back up the aisle.

 

  1. Toast. Most modern MOHs are asked to give a toast to the couple at the reception. Make sure your thoughts are well presented and make the bride look good.

 

  1. Have a good time. Dance. Eat cake. Decorate the couple’s car. Enjoy yourself at the wedding; once you’ve made it that far, you’ve earned it!